Last month, Wentworth Miller broke a million hearts the world over when he confirmed that he is in fact a gay man. The Prison Break superstar became a Hollywood heart-throb while playing the lead role in the stupendously successful TV show, though would ultimately confirm his homosexuality in a rather unexpected manner.
Having been invited to the St. Petersburg International Film Festival, Miller refused to attend and penned a response condemning Russia’s attitude toward homosexuals, who are for the most part treated like criminals.
His admittance and outspoken response was deemed nothing less than heroic, but a new video of the star sheds light on much less confident and troubled past.
First published by TMZ, the video shows Miller making a speech at the weekend’s Human’s Right Campaign Dinner in Seattle. During the address, he admits that coming to terms with his sexuality was extremely difficult and that he tried to take his own life “more than once” along the way.
“I waited until my family went away for the family and I was alone in the house and I swallowed a bottle of pills,” confesses 41-year-old Miller.
“I don’t remember what happened over the next couple of days but I’m pretty sure come Monday morning I was on the bus back to school pretending everything was fine,”
“Growing up I was a target. Speaking the right way, standing the right way, holding your wrist the right way. Every day was a test and there was a thousand ways to fail.”
He also spoke of the demons he faced when embarking upon his Hollywood acting career, saying that he’d often resort to lying just to get by.
“When I thought about the possibility of coming out, how that might impact me and the career I worked so hard for, I was filled with fear.”
It was only a few weeks ago in August that Miller finally went public about his sexuality, when he refused to attend the film festival in Russia.
“As someone who has enjoyed visiting Russia in the past and can also claim a degree of Russian ancestry, it would make me happy to say yes,” he wrote in the public note.
“However, as a gay man, I must decline.”
“I am deeply troubled by the current attitude toward and treatment of gay men and women by the Russian government… the situation is in no way acceptable, and I cannot in good conscience participate in a celebratory occasion hosted by a country where people like myself are being systemically denied their basic right to live and love openly.”